Picture this - you’re in love!

It’s been a whirlwind online romance. You text for hours and have spoken over the phone too. You really get each other! Things are moving along perfectly. You’re both keen to take the next step and meet up in real life.

Your online paramour is booking flights, but there’s a problem.

Maybe it’s a payroll situation with their employer, or their bank. Whatever the case, they need to borrow some money for airfares but will pay you back tomorrow, once it is all sorted.

While you trust this person, this is a red flag that you are likely caught up in a potential romance scam.

These scams are run by fraudsters who fake romantic interests in people, to swindle you out of your money or personal information.

Romance scams cost unsuspecting (and subsequently heartbroken) Australians $23.5 million in 2024 ( Scamwatch.gov.au) and are the third largest online scam in the country.

Often taking place on dating apps and social media, they can happen at any age and to anyone looking for love.

How do romance scams work?

Typically, scammers create fake accounts on dating apps, social media or websites to seek out people looking for love and friendship. They will usually use photographs of other people, and often pretend to be celebrities, as a way of engaging in online messaging with a view to gaining a person’s trust.

Then, after months of communication, they’ll suddenly ask for money.

It could be that they have an emergency in their life and need to borrow money. Sometimes, they claim to be having card / payment issues when booking flights to visit their online romantic partner (aka target). Another common scam is trying to convince you to invest in fake cryptocurrency schemes – all in the name of love.

Whichever method they use, it ends with them taking your money and you not being able to get it back.

What to watch out for

• The relationship moves fast and they soon say they have strong feelings for you. They message and / or call a lot, making you feel special.

• The scammer tries to move your chat from a dating app or social media platform to a different messaging service (like WhatsApp, GoogleHangouts, WeChat, etc).

• There is always a reason why they can’t meet in person or video chat. Common excuses are that they’re overseas, in a poor phone / internet area, or their technology isn’t working.

• They begin trying to show you how to make “easy money” and encourages you to do the same via cryptocurrency or other “investments”.

• Once there’s a connection, they tell you they have an emergency and urgently need your money. Or ask you to set up accounts or transfer money they give you.

• They are secretive and ask you to trust them while also attempting to cut you off from family and friends.

How to protect yourself

Never send money to someone you haven’t met

• If they ask for money, they’re likely a scammer. Stop contact right away.

• Never send personal information, card or bank details, and identity documents to someone you only know online.

• Never agree to transfer money for someone else. They may be involving you in a crime like money laundering, meaning you could be charged with a criminal offence.

Take things slowly

• Ask lots of questions. Watch out for things that don’t add up and check they are who they say they are.

• If you have a picture of them, do a reverse image search to find out if the same picture has been used in different places, associated with different names or personal details.

• Be careful what you share, or don’t share

• Don’t send intimate photographs or video to someone you don’t know. A scammer could use them to blackmail you.

• Don’t keep an online relationship secret. Tell people you trust about it, they can often more clearly spot something that doesn’t seem right.

• Think carefully about sharing information about your job, hobbies or family online. Scammers might use this to steal your identity.

What to do if you’ve been scammed

• Contact your bank immediately to report the scam.

• Change your password on all devices.

• Contact IDCARE to get help to recover. Australia and New Zealand’s cyber support network, IDCARE can help you make a free plan to limit the damage. Call them on 1800 595 160 or visit their website to find out more.